Wedding Etiquette – Invitations

Invitations can seem like such a minor thing in the scheme of wedding planning – but they’re often the cause of the biggest headaches for the bride and grooms. But The White Files has your back – with the solutions for your most pressing wedding invite related issues.

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In the Beginning

How far in advance should you send your wedding invitations?

I think up to three months is a good time, at the latest I’d leave it to eight weeks before the
wedding. Be sure to give your guests adequate time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements if need be. A massive benefit of sending the invites earlier is that it means you can ask for the RSVP date to be earlier – so you can get a head start on the dreaded seating arrangements and pass the final head count onto your vendors! Which leads me to the question…

When should you ask for RSVPs?

A minimum amount of time should be two weeks before your big day, this leads enough time for the seating arrangements and to pass on the numbers to vendors. Any time before these two weeks will make your life a lot easier! Do a bit of old fashion calculating and leave around 15 days between the estimated invitation’s arrival and your RSVP
deadline. To encourage your guests to respond faster you can always include pre-stamed enclosure cards or allowing RSVPs via email.

wedding invites

Addressing the Invite

How To Address an Envelope
In an age where many of us would never have sent a letter -it can be quite daunting getting the correct order correctly. If it’s a couple with different last names, alphabetically and on separate lines on the outer envelope:
Ms. Jessica Myers
Mr. Ronald Stevenson

If the same last name – the alphabetical order of the first name

Mr. Adam Jones
Ms. Susan Jones

On the inside of the invite, you can just write ‘The Jones’.

If one of the guests is titled (e.g. Dr)
The spouse with the professional title is listed first. Outer envelope: ‘Dr. Sarah Smith and Mr. John Smith’, or ‘Dr. Sarah Smith and Mr. John Smith’.

How to Invite a +1
According to etiquette experts out there – you’re never supposed to write ‘and Guest’ on your invites. Instead, go the extra mile and find out the name of the significant other you will be inviting.

 To Write or to Print addresses?
Remember that old thing, hand writing? Apparently it comes in handy for some things! Etiquette experts say that you should never print addresses with a computer, but always handwrite them. Remember, a wedding is an extremely intimate and personal event, and your invitations should reflect that. If it’s a matter of time or you’ve got 500 invitations to address, enlist the help of your mum, your sisters, your bridesmaids and anyone else who’s got nice handwriting to plow through them. Plus lets be honest, you always get excited when you get a hand addressed letter because you know there’s something a whole lot more exciting than a bill in there!

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Responding To an Invite

Here’s a bit of handy information for all you wedding guests out there!

What is the difference between RSVP and “Regrets Only”?
RSVP is short for the French phrase ‘Repondez, s’il vous plait’ which means ‘Please respond’. That means you should respond either way, whether you’re able to make it or not.
‘Regrets’ or ‘Regrets Only’ means that only guests who can’t make it need to respond. This way, the couple assumes that if you don’t respond, you are coming.
Sounds simple? It is! So do it within the time that the invite has allotted so the couple doesn’t have to chase you up when they’re already so busy!

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Keep your eyes peeled to the blog for a whole range of etiquette posts to come over the next few weeks! If you have any specific questions, please don’t hesitate to ask, either comment on one of The White File’s instagram posts or send through an email to xx

These invite eye candy images are sourced from Pinterest.

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